Tag Archives: piers morgan

WOWS Podcast Ep.54 It’s a Pancake, nothing but s Pancake

It’s pancake day and your favourite useless tossers Jimbo & Fisher are back with another podcast episode

Fisher hosts an Instagram followers quiz and Jimbo tests Fisher on celebrities who have had feuds with Piers Morgan

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#sheffield #podcast #comedy #chapeltown #PancakeDay

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WOWS Podcast Ep.39 The Episode That Hates Christmas

This episode is dedicated to people who hate Christmas. Jimbo hosts an anti Christmas quiz and Fisher does a feature about skyscrapers which is not Christmassy in the sightest, apart from the Christmas jumper he is wearing.


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There’s nothing to see here Guv…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog, it received no ‘likes’ – which has made it about as popular as student at Oxford University who was previously educated at Brixton Comprehensive and then Lambeth College… or indeed, about as popular as student at Oxford University who was previously educated at Cambridge University. 


I was a bit surprised that I didn’t get any correspondence from people moaning about the cold weather – although I’m guessing that no-one was able to send me messages because it had snowed a bit (and in any event, the majority of everyone’s time was been taken up Tweeting and updating Facebook status to say that it was snowing).


Anyhow, it’s time to move on to today’s ‘blog, which was going to be about England’s shock eight-nil win last night against San Marino, but then as I was about to start writing the ‘blog, it was announced that Boris Berezovsky had been found dead – this also coincides with the tragic news that Piers Morgan is alive and well…  


But who exactly is Boris Berezovsky? Well, I don’t really know – although I can confirm that it’s far easier to spell his first name than it is to spell his surname.  


He’s also a Russian billionaire (which on the scale of ‘being a shady character’ ranks around the same area as a mobile phones salesman based in the Middle East) and he had a massive falling out with Vladimir Putin… and he’s now dead… and unsurprisingly there’s been new research revealed today which has shows that bears like to defecate in the woods…


Do I want to state on a public ‘blog that I believe that the circumstances surrounding the death of an enemy of the Russian state is in any way suspicious? 




Because it wasn’t suspicious, clearly. 


Obviously it was the case than a man who had survived previous assassination attempts died whilst having a bath (there were suspicions that Berezovsky had been taking drugs – although tests show that he was clean…).


Another recent controversy involving Berezovsky was his bitter legal battle with Roman Abramovich… Berezovsky claimed that Abramovich forced him to sell some shares at a ridiculously low value… Abramovich then came back with many claims against Berezovsky… these were refuted strongly by Berezovsky who claimed the allegations were disgusting and insulting… particularly the suggestion that Berezovsky has been lined up as the next Chelsea manager…


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Take a look at me now…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog (there were no ‘likes’). Indeed, it’s hardly a surprise given that the format of the ‘blog totally messed up and looked as fundamentally wrong as the idea of George Michael teaching a course in how to drive safely – it was also the silliest format of something I’ve seen since the 2001 Wimbledon tennis tournament started with the final on day 1 and then worked backwards to the first round… although at least it meant Tim Henman got through to the second week for a change…


I was a bit surprised to see that no police officers contacted me to complain – although I think that a fair amount of them were a bit busy passing top secret information to News International or carelessly shooting Brazilians wearing bomber jackets (not that kind of bomber…).


Anyhow, it’s time stop talking about guns and move onto today’s ‘blog, which is about guns. Specifically, it’s about guns in America and their views on gun control. One big anti-gun campaigners is the demi-god that is Piers Morgan… sorry, I meant ‘the dickhead that is Piers Morgan’. To be fair to him, and I’ll happily say it, I agree with Piers Morgan on this point – even though I wouldn’t be that adverse to someone shooting Piers Morgan.


After numerous recent gun-related atrocities in American schools, the state of South Dakota have announced that they will allow teachers (and other people who work in schools) to carry guns with them if they want, the idea is that by giving people guns it will make things safer. That’s a great plan, could there possibly be a better way to prevent schoolchildren getting shot than putting guns into schools?


Yes. Yes there could… and it would involving not bringing in laws that actively encouraged people taking guns into school. Such a viewpoint is about as logical as getting a tax avoider like Philip Green to head up a Government review it getting people to pay tax… oh no wait, that actually happened…


I suppose the preferred method should just be to give all the schoolchildren guns as well. Then that way they could adopt a star wars approach and everyone would be safe as all the people had the same weaponry and therefore everything would be fine – that would work surely?


Clearly it wouldn’t and I was watching a staunch advocate of gun use was on the news giving a speech the other day about allowing every man and woman in American access to a gun… he was also wearing a pretty horrible vest with no shirt and jumper… it all looked a bit inappropriate and vests like that should be banned… although the American constitution does give the right for him to bear his arms…

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Laughing all the way to the Banksy…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog, indeed it got no ‘likes’ which made it about as popular as a man who hates rugby union in Wales (by the way, if you’re French; just a quick one to say hard lines on losing all your matches in the Six Nations so far).

Apparently George Osborne would have got in touch with me to lodge an official complaint towards the ‘blog, but he was said to be struggling to spell ‘AAA’. In any event, he was also trying to go back and destroy every bit of videotape which contained footage of him harping on about how important it is to retain our AAA credit rating.

Anyhow, it’s time to move onto today’s topic, which is about a bank called Manny… sorry, that’s wrong… it’s about a man called Banksy.

He’s a street artist who puts graffiti on walls, but he does it really well so apparently that’s alright. Somehow, I can’t imagine a burglar would get off from going to prison on the basis that he did a bit of vacuuming and dusting before he nicked your television and laptop (which isn’t quite what people mean when they’ve been burgled and say they’ve been ‘cleaned out’).

Banky’s mural named ‘slave labour’ was taken down from its home next to a Poundland (talking about slave labour, is it true that they only pay their employees £1 an hour or something?) and it then appeared for sale at an auction house in Miami with an anticipated sale price of £450,000 – which would probably buy the seller around 450,000 items from the Poundland store…

Talking about money though, the artist in question would be the expert as I’m sure that I heard recently that he and his family were in such financial difficulties that the Government had to come in and bail the Banksy’s out…

Anyhow, I suppose it’s slightly amusing that the mural free for everyone to see of a child labourer making some union jack bunting and effectively poking fun at capitalism was then attempted to be sold at auction by a quick-thinking American trying to make an enormous profit with virtually no work.

I’s guess that the great appeal about Banksy and the thought-provoking undertones of his work is that his identity is totally unknown… and it’s a real shame that Piers Morgan hasn’t thought about taking a similar approach to life…

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