Tag Archives: Manchester United

Paying the Pryce…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog. Indeed, I had absolutely no ‘likes’ whatsoever; which made the ‘blog about as popular as a right-wing politician at the funeral of Hugo Chavez – on the subject of Hugo Chavez, there’s been many tributes to him, with some people even printing his initials on their bathroom taps as a way to remember him. 

 

I was half expecting to receive some letters through the post from Manchester United fans. Although this didn’t really logically flow, so I then expected to receive a few turds in a bottle. Fortunately this didn’t happen, as a result I didn’t receive any bottles containing putrid content – although I was given a few bottles of Carling the other day…

 

Following my mention of football yesterday, it was notable that Rio Ferdinand was let off by UEFA following his actions at the final whistle of the Manchester United game on Tuesday – when he heard the news, he went and clapped loudly in the face of the man who made the decision… 

 

Anyhow, it’s time to crack on with today’s ‘blog and I wasn’t surprised to see that Chris Huhne’s estranged wife Vicky Pryce had been convicted of perverting the course of justice… also there was a story about a policemen who had conducted a survey on the defication habits of koalas… and it turned out that bears do sh*t in the woods… and it’s hard to know which was the greater waste of police time… 

 

(I’ve had a busy day…)

 

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United in defeat…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog, it got no ‘likes’ although my previous ‘blog post about the drinking habits of Australians received a ‘like’ – I’m not sure why it took so long for this post to be ‘liked’, perhaps it was because it was the first time since publishing that the Australians had been sober enough to operate a computer?

 

I was surprised to see that I didn’t got many comments from the fans of Justin Bieber, although I did get 1 message which said ‘y do u h8 Justin? we luv justin u r not a Bieleiber #bieberfever #bieberforever’ – I’m not sure which Tweeter used sent me that, although I’m guessing it wasn’t Stephen Fry. 

 

Anyhow, it’s time to move on to today’s ‘blog, which is about football, particular it’s about a team called Manchester United (I was going to write about the president of Venezuela dying, but I decided to write about Wayne Rooney and Co – so it’s more about Chavs than it is about Chavez). 

 

Besides, I was desperately trying to think of a pun based around the name of the capital of Venezuela, but I couldn’t think of one – and trying to craft a good pun was driving me Caracas…

 

Talking about things that are crackers, the Turkish referee in the Manchester United game made a terrible decision last night; well, that’s the opinion of the Man United fans – for the opposition fans, it was a Turkish delight… 

 

I was a bit surprised when I heard the team news for Man United last night and that Wayne Rooney had been left out of the team. I also scoured the teamsheet and saw that that Christiano Ronaldo bloke who was quite good for Man United a few years ago wasn’t on Man United’s team list, but it turned out that he was actually playing and that’s not a joke – it was for Real…

 

The game was going okay until Man United’s Portuguese winger kicked the former Liverpool player Xabi Alonso in the chest (surely Alonso didn’t deserve to be kicked – even if he did formerly to play for Liverpool) and the Man United star was shown a card that was the same colour as Sir Alex Ferguson’s face and he became quite upset – he started crying and asked for his Nani…

 

Anyhow, Sir Alex was quick to comment on the decision… apparently it was a, ‘f*cking awfully sh*t decision, which was f*cking embarrassingly bad and so f*cking sh*t that the absolute f*cking w*nker of a referee should be f*cking ashamed of his f*cking embarrassing self’… Real Madrid’s manager then asked Ferguson if he though the decision was the correct one… Ferguson was quick to respond… he said, ‘No way, Jose’… 

 

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News Justin…

There wasn’t much feedback on yesterday’s ‘blog, it got no ‘likes’ – which made it less popular than Christiano Ronaldo was in Manchester 5 years ago, but more popular than he is tonight (I’m hoping he doesn’t blast a penalty over the bar in the last minute, otherwise I’ll have just looked a bit stupid – and watching the football will probably lead to today’s ‘blog being streamlined). 

 

I was a bit surprised that no-one from Rolls Royce has contacted me yet. Although apparently they are sending me a letter, but it’s coming via the Cayman Islands as it’s far more tax efficient…

 

Anyhow, it’s time to press on with today’s blog, which is about a little girl called Justine Bieber who is a popular singer. 

 

I’m only joking, Justine Bieber is a man… well, he’s a boy – I’ll be honest, I don’t really want to annoy his fans as they’re notoriously keen to hassle people on Twitter and via other social networks… and in any event it’s Justine Bieber’s job to annoy his fans. 

 

I say that because he allegedly came out to perform at his concert at the O2 arena last night 2 hours late – although if I was watching Justine Bieber and he didn’t appear for a while, I don’t think I’d really be all that bothered.

 

Unfortunately, it’s not the first controversy that Justine Bieber has been involved in this year – one wild rumour speculated that he might be called Justin… and there was also an unfortunate incident this year where he was caught taking drugs, which led to some of his upset fans self-harming… they listened to his album… 

 

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