Tag Archives: Camera

Speaking a thousand words…

It’s often said that a picture speaks a thousands words. Although a picture of David Cameron probably only says one word: tw*t. Also, if Ed Miliband shows you a picture to avoid hearing 1,000 words of his horrific nasal tones the surely that isn’t a bad thing? For balance, I should probably mention Nick Clegg – but I have a preference to only write about people who’ll still be MP’s in 3 year’s time…

Whilst it’s believed that Chris Moyles refuses to have his photo taken (as he’d much rather speak the thousand words), perhaps the phrase will become outdated as the medium of photography changes? This week, camera seller Jessops went into Administration and it was announced that most of their stores will close – when it was announced their chief executive’s face was a picture… (or a thousand words)…

Obviously, there’s no real need for the casual photographer to purchase a good quality camera as most smartphones now have cameras more megapixels than the number of hot diners consumer by John Prescott (2 a day, every day, for the last 47 years).

Whilst Jessops’ demise has gone in a Flash, it is slightly ironic that in a world ruled by security cameras and speed cameras (but not CAMRA, the Campaign for Real Ale) that a place that simply sells cameras has gone bust.

No doubt things will Develop further, but Jessops isn’t the only camera company to suffer financial difficulties: apparently if the amount of money owed to creditors by Olympus was stacked on top of each other, then it would reach the same height as a Greek mountain [feel free to update that joke with the words ‘Fuji’ and ‘Japanese’ – preferably over the words ‘Olympus’ and ‘Greek’, otherwise it won’t make any sense] and when the head of Kodak found out that they were struggling financially… well, it was quite a moment…

In a few year’s time, no doubt a polaroid will only be known as an embarrassing problem that Sir Randulph Finnes and other arctic explorers have on their bottoms and people will no longer have the luxury of storing years of photographs in shoe boxes – instead they might have to start putting shoes in them, or just recycling their cardboard with the same proficiency that Peter Kay recycles his jokes.

I suppose, and in a nod towards yesterday’s ‘blog, everything can be done online nowadays: you can buy your CD’s online, you can develop your photographs online and some people even waste their time writing ‘blogs every day (losers). I heard that the latest developments are that you will soon be able to go to the toilet over the internet… although surely that’s taking the piss…

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Dirty Harry

Young ginger balls has… well… proved he’s got ginger balls by the sounds of it.

I once remember meeting Prince Harry whilst I was coming out of a public toilet and there were 2 people queuing ahead of him. I said to him, “you’re third in line to the throne”.

That anecdote is obviously a load of tripe, but the point stands that Prince Harry was photographed with his clothes off in a Las Vegas hotel, the city which is the doyen of gaming world when people play black jack, roulette and, apparently, strip billiards.

I used to play the odd bit of billiards when I was younger on my miniature snooker table (what a rebel) and I remember that one of the key components to scoring was to get the two balls to cannon against each other – I’m rather hoping this wasn’t a part of strip billiards.

Speculation was rife in the media with many commentators… erm… well… commentating, obviously. One breaking headline on BBC News channel advised that the photograph was “believed to be taken with a camera”. Presumably this information was there just to clarify in case anyone thought the pictures were taken using a piece of shortbread.

After the pictures had been placed on the internet (pictures of naked people on the internet, whatever next). The Sun then decided to take a bold post-Leveson Inquiry move to publish them claiming that it would be “perverse not to” – which could potentially mean that the people who aren’t printing naked photos are perverts?

Nonetheless, I can kind of sympathise with Prince Harry and the magnification of that is placed on most events in his personal life. For his part, Prince Harry has said that he wants a quiet few days and he’ll be spending some time with his family… and Prince Charles…

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