Something fishy going on…

There wasn’t much feedback about yesterday’s ‘blog, although Piers Morgan Tweeted yesterday saying the Prince Harry should be ashamed to say that he shot at an enemy whilst on duty in Afghanistan.

You tell him Piers!

It’s great to hear Piers Morgan defended our troops… it’s just a shame that he resigned as editor of The Mirror after he falsely accused British troops of abusing Iraqi citizens.

Still, at least Piers Morgan isn’t one of those people who criticises brave and courageous men and woman who risk their lives on a daily basis for tarnishing the name of the armed forces when he publicly accused them of doing something far worse… oh no, wait… he is exactly one of those people.

Anyhow, it’s time to get cracking with today’s ‘blog and whilst I’m on the subject of things that are slippy, slimy and sometimes so pungent that they make people physically sick, I should say that I regularly eat fish.

I love to eat fish, I’ll happily eat fish cooked in a variety of different styles and aligned to different cultures & cuisines (although I once ate a some sushi and I wasn’t happy – I think I got a raw deal…).

Also, I’ll happily pay good money for fish, and I wouldn’t be required to visit the man who sells One Pound Fish (which is quite a heavy fish). Although it’s worth pointing out that I was once massively overcharged for a smoked fish a few years ago – the fishmonger must have seen me coming and I was done up like a Kipper…

You might now be thinking that a recurring theme in this ‘blog post will be that I’m going to mention a load of fish and fishing related puns. If you did think that; you’d be right – that’s exactly what I’m Angling for.

To be truthful, I’ve only fished twice: on the first occasion I caught nothing (it was a real carp effort from me… sorry, ‘crap effort from me’) and on the second occasion I caught an old boot (although I don’t know where the rest of the car was) and Keith Chegwin’s career – which was at the bottom of the lake having sunk without trace around 17 years ago.

I didn’t find any mackerel, which is just as well as it has now been removed from the Maritime Conservation Society’s list of approved ‘fish-to-eat’ fish as people are being greedy and stocks are running low. This issue about the stocks running low is quite serious as well; I was in Sainsbury’s the other day and there were hardly any on the shelves at all – they need to fish more of them, not less!

The issue has become the subject of meetings between UK delegates and Icelandic delegates, both of whom are keen to protect their mackerel fishing quotas. There has been 12 rounds of talks so far (that’s actually true) and as such, the referee is now going to get the scores from the 3 judges and raise the arm of the victorious delegate and declare him as the winner of the 12 round delegation on points (that actually isn’t true, I made it up).

It’s also the case that the mackerel fishing delegates are becoming greater in numbers and with so many of them in the tiny delegation room, they’re starting to complain about being packed in like sardines… and it goes without saying that this is actually a serious issue that affects peoples’ livelihoods and I shouldn’t make stupid fish related jokes, after all there’s a time and Plaice for that kind of thing…

It’s a shame that the meeting of delegates didn’t go according to plan, but apparently they weren’t assisted by one of the key delegates being deaf, thus slowing down the meeting… I’m not sure whether he was fully deaf… but he was certainly hard of herring…

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