On your bike… well… maybe not…

It seems that after I wrote about Amazon’s dominance of the audio and visual media retailing market on Thursday, HMV has now been placed into Administration. I can’t imagine that this ‘blog was the tipping point, but you never know? Perhaps when I state that I’m surprised something hasn’t happened, the WOWS ‘blog has the power to make it come true? If that is the case, then obviously I’m as surprised by this news as I am at the news that no-one has ever transferred £1million into my bank account and that Piers Morgan has never been roundhouse kicked in the face by Chuck Norris.

However, something that doesn’t surprise me is that a cyclist has taken performance enhancing drugs. One thing that does disappoint me is that one of the cyclists alleged to have taken them is former 7-time Tour de France winner, charity fundraiser and alleged human pin-cushion Lance Armstrong. Armstrong pretty much had it all, but now the Armstrong bubble has been bust with such force that anyone would have thought it was punctured by an almighty Lance…

A slight pause for thought might be to say that Armstrong was competing in a field of competitors amongst whom doping was rife and yet he still won the Tour de France on 7 occasions, so in effect he doped really well and managed to beat several cheats, albeit whilst cheating himself.

Not many sports suffer drugs problems. Football is a slight exception, particularly when the accusation was made that Fabio Capello had forced the England football team to take performance-enhancing drugs during the 2008 World Cup. The claims were said to be false after tests adjudged that England’s performance hadn’t been enhanced and were instead scientifically classified as been ‘f*cking sh*t’…

In terms of cheating in sport, cycling is difficult to top, particularly as Armstrong’s titles haven’t been re-allocated yet as it’s difficult to identify who was and wasn’t cheating – the 2003 title may now be going to Jacob Straw, aged 7 from Buckinghamshire, who is one of the few known cyclists not to have taken drugs and he rode his bike in the Dordogne whilst on his summer holiday with his Mummy and Daddy.

That said, it’s easy to criticise, but I once saw James Toesland and Valentino Rossi in a race and they were definitely cheating – their bikes even had engines on them…

For Armstrong, his road to redemption takes the unusual turn this week as he appears on the Oprah Winfrey show. Armstrong flew from his Texan home to Winfrey’s studio in New York to be interviewed – I’m presuming he used an airplane, but I suppose it depends how many performance enhancing drugs he’s actually taken.

The content of the interview is still being kept under wraps with Winfrey saying that he ‘did not come clean in the way she expected’ perhaps she thought he might have had the decency to own up in a Court of Law? Or in one of the interviews when he claimed that he’d taken over 400 tests and never failed once (the only slight controversy being in 2001 when he poured orange juice into urine sample instead of weeing and tested positive for being an orange – which technically didn’t count as doping, as vitamin C isn’t a banned substance).

The main reason that Armstrong is allegedly considering confessing all is that he wants to cycle again having cycled for many years previously; to this end, he recently went to a hearing with cycling’s governing body. The hearing didn’t go well; he left disappointed and threw all his glass bottles and cardboard into the wheelie bin on the way out… he was told that he’d never be able to re-cycle…

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