Health is a huge part of modern life. If it wasn’t for health, you’d probably be dead. Below Jimbo (@JimboStudios) and Fisher (@CFishTank) part take in another session of #TweetsNowtOnTV – this time its #HealthTweetsNowtOnTV. Quick, someone call a doctor, this blog is side splitting.
Parkinson’s – An illness that makes you feel the need to interview anyone who sits on your sofa
Scale & Polish – when a dentists climbs up your teeth with a can of Mr Sheen and a feather duster
Ultrasound – is how you would describe someone who is more than great
Pharmacy – where you can by medicine for cows/chickens and sheep
Piles – annoying, irritating and aggravating but that’s enough about Jedward
Midwife – a man who is on his third marriage would describe his 2nd wife as this
Hygiene – is how you would greet someone called Jean
Tourette’s – I have a friend who has this who says a good way to deal with it is eating lots of fruit. He swears by it
Mole – they sit on your face and secretly listen to what you are saying
Short Sighted – most English football Premiership referees suffer with this
Key Hole Surgery – a form of cosmetic surgery for doors
NHS – if you want to find out what I have to say about this then you will have to join my waiting list
X-Ray – someone who used to be called Ray
Bandage – is a collection of pop singers and bands raising money for old people at a big concert
Plaster – I fell over after getting drunk. and cut my knees. Luckily a first aid kit was on hand. I was plastered
Aids – I knew a man who had unprotected sex with a lorry – he ended up being HGV positive
Inflamed colon – involves having massive punctuation in the book you’re reading
MRSA – was the wife of Mr A